Copyright thenassauguardian
Recently, we have seen an uptick in violence directed toward women and children. Our most recent headline reveals the murder of a pregnant young woman, allegedly at the hands of her lover. Domestic violence cannot be eliminated altogether, but it can be reduced, and today, we will take a look at how domestic violence can be reduced. The reason domestic violence happens is that broken people and hurt people tend to hurt others. In order to fix the problem, we have to get to the root causes and address them, otherwise the wheels will keep spinning and the revolving door of domestic violence will continue claiming victims. From my perspective, I see several contributing factors that have and continue to cause domestic violence. There may be other reasons, but here are a few that I have identified. Broken people: People who have been abused, come from abuse or are suffering mental illnesses. Substance abuse: Substance abuse is a major contributing factor, as intoxication is often a precursor to violence. Lack of knowledge: Many individuals do not have the knowledge necessary to resolve conflicts and in many cases do not know how relationships work, so they react instinctively. Family disintegration: Many young people today grow up without a stable family and lack love and nurturing, resulting in dysfunction. Spiritual guidance: Many today grow up without the principles and teachings that have steered others into the right path. The level of church attendance continues to decline, resulting in a lack of moral and spiritual training. On the other hand, the air waves and social media bombards with pornography and violence. Media and culture: Our social media and culture continually share imagery of violence and abuse, exposing younger populations to things they would have not been exposed to until they were adults. The combination of these factors is producing a fragile and explosive population, that are facing a minefield of obstacles on their journey. I have volunteered with the national parenting body in The Bahamas and have been surprised at what is happening in our country. In the program, parents are sent by the courts to training sessions to equip them to be better parents. As I listened to their stories, I have been amazed at the state of marriages, families and parenting in The Bahamas. A number of these parents have been required to do anger management classes because of their issues with violence toward their partners and children. I remember attending one of the graduation ceremonies and a male parent testified to his transformation because of exposure to anger management and relationship management strategies. He indicated that he was angry that he had to go to the parenting classes and was only there because of a court order, but in the end he was extremely grateful for the knowledge because his life was transformed. He did not think he needed counseling, but through the process realized that the counseling saved him and his family. He expressed thanks to the organizers and indicated that he would recommend the classes to his friends because it was so impactful. As I listened to him, I realized that there are so many others out there like him, who are ignorant about what has happened to them and why they behave the way they do. Some are never confronted or exposed to the knowledge needed to steer them in the right direction. So, they end up captive to their own challenges and experience continual frustration that they then take out on their loved ones. Once they have the opportunity to gain knowledge and to be in a caring and instructive environment, their outcomes change and others in their orbit become the beneficiaries. We need more intervention and exposure for the perpetrators of domestic violence in order to change their outcomes. Hopefully, more will be done nationally to cause this to happen through the government, the church and relevant agencies. • Pastor Dave Burrows is senior pastor at Bahamas Faith Ministries International. Feel free to email comments, whether you agree or disagree, to pastordaveburrows@ hotmail.com. I appreciate your input and dialogue. We become better when we discuss, examine and exchange.
