Copyright dailyrecord
I’ve been with my fiance for three years but it hasn’t been plain sailing, as he has an ex-wife and two children. The stress of it all got a bit much about a year into our relationship and we broke up for a bit. We missed each other and decided to give things another go and now we’re very happy. The problem is when we split up he went back to his ex and they slept together for a while before realising it was never going to work. I found it very hard to get over the fact he slept with his ex because it felt like our relationship had meant nothing to him. I also think it was a bit of a victory for her and that she holds it over me. She once said to me: “You know he’ll always come back to us.” She’s always been a difficult person and that’s ramped up now my partner and I are engaged . We’re getting married next year and she’s already being awkward about the part her sons are playing in the wedding . My fiance seems to be on the phone to her constantly, which drives me insane and I’m sure she knows that. On the positive side, he and I are good and, since getting back together, we’ve been a lot more open and honest with each other. However, his ex’s words about him going back to them still ring in my head. Any advice on how to move forward would be appreciated . His children will always be a part of his life but his ex doesn’t have to play a big role. They probably need to communicate a fair bit about arrangements if the kids are young but there will be less need for that as they get older. I think it’s important to talk to your fiance about boundaries around his ex and you should be able to tell him how you feel. I think it would help you if you can stop getting wound up by her messages and calls. Don’t see everything she does as a move to annoy you. Try to be not bothered instead of giving her power over your emotions. Don’t let her stir up trouble in your relationship. Be more confident in yourself and take the control back. The bottom line is, she’s divorced from him and you’re getting married to him. Yes, it might have been a bit of a bumpy, messy journey to get there, but it sounds like this break made everyone realise something important about leaving the past behind and moving on. Focus on the wedding and all the joy around that and leave your fiance to sort out the details over his children. His ex will only get to you if you allow her to do so.
