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Vacations consist of camping trips (not conducive to romance in my mind. People everywhere and too much time in the sun, which results in uncomfortable sunburns, heat, bugs, etc.). We try to find things to do that are free, but I long to get away together, just the two of us, so that we can relax and unwind together. I would also welcome any other ideas that you have. Thank you! FREE TIME A. I know you want ideas, and I’ll get to that part of the question, but first: Does your husband know you don’t like camping? I went through this letter and thought: This person should not go camping anytime soon. I say this as someone who also dislikes bugs, sunburns, and the way going to the bathroom works in the wilderness. I wonder if an alternative to camping might be a visit to an observatory where you can look at the stars. (Boston University has a nice night for this, from what I hear.) Another idea for privacy and change: a house swap. If you watch the movie “The Holiday” you’ll learn that house swaps are how you find romance and rediscover yourself (especially if you are Cameron Diaz). Rick Steves has written about some of these services (HomeExchange is one). So has The Boston Globe! It could be a new way to travel on the cheap without having to think about ticks. Yes, your kids would have to vacate the premises, but they can go to a friend’s house, right? You might consider asking your own friends if they’d ever want to try this idea for fun. Sometimes I think, “I’d love to see my friend in Alameda. But also, what if she took over my place in Massachusetts, and I went to California, and we overlapped one night for an amazing dinner?” Maybe someone in your life wants to try this adventure. My last pitch is one of my local faves: the MassArt Art Museum. I know I mention this place a lot, but it’s free — and people can forget it’s there because it’s in the shadow of the Museum of Fine Arts. The MAAM has events where people can do their own art and see live music. Very romantic. Don’t take these arts institutions for granted. They make programming for us, sometimes for nothing. Let’s do all the things. MEREDITH READERS RESPOND: Non-romantic vacations aren’t cheap. REID-MOORE Put your foot down about camping. There are those who love it. You and I do not. Calculate a figure for your adult children to pay for rent and board. What would it cost them on their own? Let your husband know and have input. It is not an unreasonable request. Discuss a timeframe for them to move out, even if it’s six months. That’s not an unreasonable request, either. ... Next, figure out a budget and length of time off. You may be pleasantly surprised at travel deals. Tourism is down in many places. Look at staying somewhere Monday through Thursday night. There can be big discounts on weekdays. JIVEDIVA Camp early or late in the season when it’s not so hot. Use sunscreen and bug repellent and camp away from others — it can be romantic. SW623 You could advertise to housesit and pet sit — which is different from house-swapping. You will get away from your children, not have to pay for a hotel, and be able to explore a new area. The minimal pay will probably cover gas/food. Many people would prefer a mature and responsible adult to “sit” rather than the neighborhood kids or college kids. AUNTIGGYWINK I suspect two grown kids at home are the biggest romance killer. PRONE2XS Just start being more outwardly affectionate around the house. Maybe some flirting, kissing, [etc.]. Those kids will find someplace else to be, and fast. THE-BLOG-CONSIGLIERIE
