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The yearning I have to go away [for Christmas] and think if I come home, it won't have happened,' says Bláthnaid Ni Chofaigh. Bláthnaid's talking about the loss of her sister Brid, who passed away from cervical cancer in January, plunging the family into grief. Bríd was the youngest in the family and arrived when their mother was in her mid-forties, meaning that she had a somewhat different upbringing than her siblings, choosing to stay close to their home while still being a very social person, according to her sister. Bríd was first diagnosed with her illness at the height of the pandemic, but despite their concerns and the upheaval in the world, they soldiered on because her situation hadn't reached a life-threatening stage, 'Bríd was 'just sick.' Looking back now, Bláthnaid is in awe of her sister's bravery in going through so much without leaning heavily on her loved ones. View this post on Instagram 'To lie in that room all through the day and night and not be ringing and saying: "I'm scared?" She was managing her way. I wouldn't be able, I'd just be crying all the time,' she told the Irish Times Magazine. There was more crushing news when the family learned that the cancer had spread to Bríd's lymph nodes, but she refused to be bowed down by her illness, insisting on going on holiday with family and friends despite being so unwell and struggling to walk. As the family toasted to 2025 on New Year's Eve, Bríd, who had been 'loving' the night, became unwell and Blathanid subsequently took her to the Beacon hospital. 'She never came home,' she says. Several weeks later and having not long left the hospital, Bláthnaid got a call at 5am to say that Bríd was in a bad way and she sadly passed away several hours later. Months later, Bláthnaid says she sometimes still finds herself waking up at 5am. She has chosen to open the door on her grief to urge women not to underestimate the importance of getting regular smear tests. She also feels that the death of an adult sibling is something that doesn't get spoken about often. 'The dynamic changes so much with this kind of death, Everything changes... You're not little kids in a house anymore, but I suppose you do still feel like little kids in a house, like you're all small together. 'Losing a sibling is sort of like a secret; people will grab me and say quietly, I heard about your sister, I lost my brother, it's cruel,' she says. Bláthnaid went on to describe how hard to was to lose her father but how losing her sister wasn't just terribly sad, it was 'awful.' It also prompted her to look at the relationships she has with her other siblings differently, and also with her children, and she finds herself urging them to look out for one another. Bláthnaid will be spending Christmas with her daughter in Sydney this year.
