Copyright newsweek
A millennial woman who has been single for seven years has gone viral after sharing a heartbreaking realization she had, but the internet has responded in the most supportive way. Leila has spent most of her thirties single, and for the most part, trying to live her best life. But there’s one particular thought that recently crossed the 38-year-old’s mind, and it’s pretty sobering. Leila, of Connecticut, shared a video on TikTok (@luckygoleila) explaining that she isn’t anyone else’s priority in life, and likewise, she doesn’t have someone to prioritize in return. Whether it’s someone to talk to after a long day, after doing something great at work, or just having someone to depend on. In many ways, this realization “feels freeing,” Leila told Newsweek, but it was also quite demoralizing. Leila, 38, sitting in her car and talking about being single. @luckygoleila / TikTok “Most people would say their partner or children come first,” Leila said. “I have wonderful friends and family who value and appreciate me, but I don’t think I’m anyone’s first call or first thought. It’s just part of this phase of my life. “I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. No one depends on me, and choosing myself doesn’t mean letting anyone down. But there are moments when I wish I had someone to share certain experiences with.” Leila has been single for seven years, and while she has a wonderfully supportive community, it can be hard to process this realization. She does her best to show up for those around her, and they do what they can to help make Leila feel special too. But ultimately, Leila’s experience is something that many modern-day singletons can relate to. Since sharing her thoughts on TikTok, the video went viral with over 3.7 million views and more than 545,000 likes at the time of writing. The caption alongside the clip reads: “feeling down but hopeful.” The online reaction to the video is beyond anything Leila expected, and she’s been so heartened by the support she’s received. Leila said: “Living alone sometimes means not having someone to unpack your day with, so posting on TikTok has become that for me. Saying things out loud helps me process, and giving my thoughts life outside my head feels good too. “Some people close to me felt hurt by it, which wasn’t my intention. The video was about recognizing that I need to prioritize myself more, not that others don’t value me. If anything, it opened up some honest conversations about how I’d been feeling and reminded us all to check in with each other.” Leila has received countless messages from people who connected with her experience and highlighted the importance of belonging. Of course, posting such a vulnerable video was challenging for Leila, but it helped her evaluate what’s most important for her. Realizing that she’s no one else’s priority (and going viral as a result) has encouraged Leila to start a “self-prioritization challenge.” She hopes to be more intentional about showing up for herself and to feel fulfilled through her own merit. It may have been a harsh realization, but it’s led to some incredible growth and self-improvements for Leila. “It isn’t exactly self-care, and the word ‘selfish’ has such a bad reputation, but it’s not that either. It’s more about taking care of yourself—not instead of other people, but because of them. When I take good care of myself, I can show up better for the people I love, and the same goes the other way around,” Leila told Newsweek. Since the TikTok video was shared in September, it’s generated over 16,000 comments so far. Many social media users responded with their personal experiences and words of encouragement for Leila. One comment reads: “Isn’t it such a humbling but disappointing feeling?” Another TikTok user wrote: “I feel this 100 percent. I’m not even sad about it; it is what’s it is.” Another person replied: “We are prioritizing ourselves! The rest will happen naturally.” While one commenter added: “I value and prioritize myself but it hits different when nobody does the same.” Do you have any viral videos or pictures that you want to share? We want to see the best ones! Send them in to life@newsweek.com and they could appear on our site.
