Copyright mwnation
Women by their nature and vulnerability believe they are always in a race against time. They worry as their biological clock ticks away, fearing that if they don’t get the right partner to mainly sire their children, they will ultimately kiss their desire for motherhood goodbye. They MUST find someone and find him NOW! That pressure, coupled with that aunt, uncle and even parent who constantly quizzes them about when they intend to leave the nest to begin their own lives, in their man’s house can squeeze the peace right out of any woman. The options may be narrowed quickly to push women into unprecedented unions. Last week’s entry was titled Don’t ignore the red flags. I have been prompted to write Why women ignore red flags as a follow-up and to make sense of today’s, I will provide a link at the end to allow readers and professionals to join in the debate and how best we can help the situation. And not withstanding my earlier assertion about why red flags are ignored, some situations are created by the women themselves. Many seek societal validation to fit-in and living up to its expectations. When everybody else is getting marriage after graduation or at a particular age, basically following the outlined list of achievers, some women will go to any length to beat that list. They grab anything that crosses their paths (even when it crosses in opposite direction) to create a picture-perfect scenario. This is even when they are beaten, humiliated, cheated on or support the family in his place. They go to any length to portray an admirable courtship fit for Hollywood’s script and big screens, when in reality, it is a mere show. I have seen women buy themselves flowers on those special days such as Valentine’s Day or birthday celebration, attributing it to their man. This idiot of a fellow will follow instructions to present the gifts on camera as she acts surprised, displaying a near-faint show as she receives that bouquet of fresh roses, chocolates or cake to post on her social media handles. She wants to spite others and feel as wanted as those genuinely in love and building successful marriages. Hers is just a mirage and she may even drag him to the aisle. That, my dears, is more red flags than an explosives warning, a recipe for disaster. Where is his income and do you really believe this will work out? Are you ready to take in a grown child already before the two of you bear your own? Will you take a lifetime challenge to fend for him? Do you know any man that is not ready to marry will never be unless it is his decision to do so? Will you stomach the frustration of living with a forced partnership? Will this scripted union pay the bills and buy groceries? Never believe in your power to change a man. Wait your turn even if it does not come knocking on your door when expected. His wealth, possible good life and the luxuries he offers you should not be reason to ignore what will eventually mess your life and the relationship. Sooner or later, the Ferrari, Merc, Jeep, two storey mansion, well-manicured yard and excellent sex will mean nothing when you cannot get the genuine emotional attachment and support any woman needs. It is always tempting to throw away your life and assimilate with a man you love in the name of submission or good-wife role. You are attempted to throw away your career, identity, dignity and security for a fairy-tale romance that offers nothing near Cinderella’s happily ever after. Stop seeking validation or envying others’ lives by putting pressure on yourselves. You are unique and the reason you went to school or started that business was to retain your individuality and stand up for yourself. Last week’s entry is on https://mwnation.com/dont-ignore-the-red-flags/. Share your thoughts.
