By Rich James

Copyright crikey

COALITION CIRCUS CONTINUES AS THE WORLD BURNS

You’d think a landmark report laying out the apocalyptic scenes facing the country due to climate change would result in the Coalition managing to make it through one day without generating any disastrous headlines. Then again, who are we kidding?

Yesterday the government released the country’s first National Climate Risk Assessment, which warned, among other things, that more than 1.5 million Australians are at risk from rising sea levels by 2050.

More frequent and severe flooding, cyclones, heatwaves, droughts and bushfires are all predicted. Modelling three global warming scenarios (1.5, 2 and 3 degrees Celsius), the National Climate Risk Assessment also said heatwave deaths in somewhere like Sydney would rise by more than 400% in the 3 degree scenario and double in the 1.5 degree scenario, the ABC reports. And as the BBC points out, Australia has already reached warming of above 1.5 degrees.

The Conversation, Guardian Australia, The Australian Financial Review and many other publications produced handy explainers yesterday on the main findings, and it is the reaction to those findings that finds itself at the top of many news sites this morning.

Climate Change Minister Chris Bowen told the country on Monday: “Australians are already living with the consequences of climate change today, but it’s clear every degree of warming we prevent now will help future generations avoid the worst impacts in years to come.”

Greens leader Larissa Waters declared: “The climate crisis is a risk to our safety, to nature, and to our economy and productivity. This report must be a wake-up call for Labor ahead of their 2035 climate target decision. Anything less than net zero by 2035 puts Australia on track for more than 2C warming.”

Climate Council chief executive Amanda McKenzie said: “These are the government’s own numbers and they’re terrifying. It’s the kind of bedtime reading that should keep ministers up at night. But doing too little is an active choice, and we can choose a better future by cutting climate pollution harder and faster now.”

And Liberal frontbencher Andrew Hastie suggested he’d quit or be thrown out of the shadow cabinet if the Coalition didn’t drop its commitment to net zero.

So this is where we find ourselves this morning, with publications initially covering the dire climate warnings and then unable to ignore the never-ending drama that is the federal opposition and pivoting to that circus.

The AAP this morning sums up the situation succinctly as: “The prime minister describes a climate risk report as a wake-up call, as one coalition frontbencher threatens to quit or be dumped over greenhouse gas targets.”

Having released the National Climate Risk Assessment, the government is now expected to release its 2035 emissions target. The newswire highlights Hastie’s leader Sussan Ley and her deputy Ted O’Brien are advocating for “credible” targets that do not overburden households and businesses, saying: “We need to reduce emissions, but not at any cost.”

The ABC reminds us (not that we need reminding) that Ley is facing pressure from within her ranks over the commitment to net zero. And on Monday, Hastie, who can’t stop telling us all about his own leadership ambitions, told the national broadcaster that if Ley supported the target, “that leaves me without a job”.

“I’ve nailed my colours to the mast,” he told ABC Radio Perth. “If I go out with the tide in two-and-a-half years, that’s great … I’ll get a lot more time with my kids back. My primary mission in politics is to build a stronger, more secure, more competitive Australia. Energy security is a vital input into that, so that’s my bottom line. I said that net-zero policy is a straitjacket for our economy and our country, and I believe that.”

The Nine papers reckon Hastie’s latest comments represent a “fresh test” of the opposition leader’s authority, coming just days after Ley booted Senator Jacinta Nampijinpa Price to the backbench.

The report also highlights Hastie told the ABC on Monday: “She [Ley] has my support … I wouldn’t be sitting here speaking with you as the shadow minister for home affairs”.

Asked about Hastie’s comments, a spokesperson for the Liberal leader said “we are committed to the process” of reviewing the Coalition’s climate policy (energy spokesman Dan Tehan was tasked with the unenviable job of overseeing the review in the wake of the disastrous May election).

The Nine papers conclude their coverage by citing an unnamed “colleague and ally of Ley” who declared: “For a bloke who thinks that he can be a future leader, he [Hastie] has picked a hell of a day to say he will die on the hill of net zero.

“Millions of Australians were just warned about the potentially catastrophic impacts of climate change, and he is saying to them, ‘I don’t give a stuff’.”

SOCIAL MEDIA BAN DETAILS RELEASED

Details of how the government’s social media ban for children under 16 will be implemented are due to be officially revealed today, with the information already in numerous publications this morning.

The ABC says social media companies won’t be required to test the age of every social media user or meet a minimum standard of how many children they remove from their platforms.

The national broadcaster says the Albanese government has confirmed a “lighter-touch” approach to the ban. With no legally enforceable standard for accuracy, social media companies will only have to satisfy the eSafety watchdog that they have taken “reasonable steps” to remove the accounts of users under the age of 16, the article says.

Communications Minister Anika Wells said in a statement: “The government has done the work to ensure that platforms have the information they need to comply with the new laws — and now it’s on them to take the necessary steps.”

The ABC says social media companies will not be told which age verification technology to use, “but will need to ensure their policies are transparent and consistent and that there is a process for disputes”.

The AFR reminds us that the companies face potential of fines of up to $49.5 million if they are deemed to have failed to reasonably try to get children off their platforms after the laws come into effect in December.

PNG DEFENCE DEAL DETAILS REVEALED

In other details-revealed news, the ABC also has information on the bilateral defence treaty due to be signed between Australia and Papua New Guinea this week.

The national broadcaster, which says it has seen the treaty, reports “Australia and Papua New Guinea will be legally obliged to defend each other from a military attack on either territory” and the agreement will also “give the Australian Defence Force unimpeded access to a series of designated facilities and areas within Papua New Guinea”.

The ABC says the defence deal is expected to be signed on Wednesday, with Prime Minister Anthony Albanese, Deputy Prime Minister Richard Marles, and Minister for the Pacific Pat Conroy arriving yesterday for celebrations to mark the 50th anniversary of PNG’s independence.

ON A LIGHTER NOTE…

A bride has finally tracked down the wedding crasher who awkwardly appeared at her wedding four years ago. Michelle Wylie and her husband John got married at the Carlton Hotel in Prestwick, Scotland, in November 2021. It was only when looking through the wedding photos after their big day that they spotted a tall gentleman at the ceremony that neither of them recognised, The Guardian reports.

With none of the guests or hotel staff able to identify the mysterious guest, Michelle appealed on Facebook for help but didn’t make much headway. “I was looking through the wedding pictures, and I just thought, ‘I’m going to message someone with a lot of followers and ask if they can share,’” The New York Post quotes her as explaining.

She reached out to Scottish content creator Dazza, who has over 400,000 Facebook fans and 129,000 TikTok subscribers, who promptly shared it on all his platforms. Within two hours, Andrew Hillhouse revealed himself.

It transpires that the 6ft 2in wedding crasher had been given the wrong venue for a wedding he was supposed to be attending with his partner David.

Running late, Andrew arrived at the Carlton Hotel thinking he was at the right venue and hurried in. “There was a piper playing outside, and all these well-dressed people, so I thought I was in the right place,” he told the BBC.

At the wedding he was supposed to be at, he only knew his partner and the bride, and the former was part of the bridal party, so it was only at the last moment that he realised he was at the wrong wedding.

“I assumed David was in another room with the bride, so the music starts up, everyone turns around to look at the bride and the second I see her, I’m like ‘oh no, that’s not Michaela, what’s going on here?’” Andrew said.

“But I was committed at that point, because you can’t walk out of a wedding in progress, so I thought I better double down. I’m 6ft 2in and I’m taller than everyone else, so I was trying to hunch down a bit and get out the way.” Which, if you look at the pictures, it’s fair to say he failed pretty spectacularly.

Andrew and Michelle have since met up and thankfully, Michelle sees the funny side in the whole saga. “I could not stop laughing,” she said.

Who cares if you get embarrassed? Anything can be possible. I was nothing about three years ago, I’m here now.Owen Cooper

The 15-year-old star of Netflix’s acclaimed drama Adolescence after being named best supporting actor in a limited series at the Emmys.

CRIKEY RECAP

READ ALL ABOUT IT

Israel’s Benjamin Netanyahu won’t rule out striking Hamas ‘wherever they are’ as Marco Rubio visits (ABC)

Charlie Kirk suspect linked to crime scene by DNA, says FBI chief (BBC)

Washington Post columnist says she was fired over her posts about Charlie Kirk and political violence (CNN)

Trump to speak to Xi on Friday with TikTok framework reached (AFR) ($)

The secret loan to secure Rupert Murdoch’s succession (The Age) ($)

Australian PM blames ‘aggressive protesters’ for closure of local electorate office (Guardian Australia)

THE COMMENTARIAT

Horrifying report paints grim picture of Australia’s future — Nick O’Malley (The Sydney Morning Herald): But perhaps more importantly, it shifts the national climate debate from one about potential future risk to one about a response to an immediate and tangible threat.

Those who argue against action can now more reasonably be asked what measures they would take, or to make their case for not acting at all. But it will not inoculate the government from criticism that it is not acting ambitiously enough, or that it is hypocritical for it to back Australia’s fossil fuel export industry while seeking to cut its domestic emissions.

As Bowen spoke, it had been just three days since his colleague, Environment Minister Murray Watt, gave final approval for Woodside Energy to extend the life of its vast North West Shelf gas project by 40 years, a decision likely to release an extra 4 to 6 billion tonnes of greenhouse gases into the atmosphere.

Defence dilemma facing Anthony Albanese as he heads to New York — Olivia Caisley (ABC): Australia may not be in NATO, but the pressure to keep pace is obvious and costly. A jump to 3.5% would mean an extra $30 billion a year, about the size of the Commonwealth’s entire aged care budget.

That is the tension Albanese carries into New York: billions committed at home, but a White House demanding more. The question is whether Labor’s defence blitz will be seen as enough by Washington or whether only the raw numbers count.

Last week, Trump mused that Albanese is a “good man” as he prepared to board Air Force One. A good man may be hard to find, but in this diplomatic dance, finding a figure that placates Washington without bankrupting Canberra’s own political capital is perhaps even more difficult.