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A 29-year-old woman recently opened up about her painful marriage experience, revealing that years of dating don’t always guarantee a happy relationship. She shared that she had dated her husband for two years before marrying him against her parents’ wishes, believing he was kind, hardworking and self-made. Being the sole earning member of his family and handling multiple financial responsibilities, he initially earned her admiration and respect. Soon after marriage, things changed completely. The man who once cared and supported her turned “toxic”. Despite her working long hours at three jobs, he criticised her for not “handling tasks at home” or “spending time with his mother”. She said he now shows “no empathy, ignores her health and emotions”, and mocks her for taking therapy. His constant harsh behaviour has left her emotionally drained. A Love Marriage That Turned Into A Painful Struggle Taking to Reddit, the woman wrote, “LM 5 yrs ago. Dated the guy for 2 years, lived together for 1 year before marriage. He was the most understanding, loving and empathetic person I had ever met and he loved me dearly. I got married against my parents will. His family had suffered a great deal financially because of his parents’ mistakes. He was the sole breadwinner of the family, and apart from the household, he also had (and still) to take care of other finances like legal fees, etc, for his parents. I knew about the financial troubles, but I married him against my parents’ wishes. They didn’t want me to get involved in the mess, despite the man seeming decent.” “I loved the fact that he was a self-made man. I appreciated that and I still do. I loved the fact that he could make time for me and still build an empire of his own. I’m much younger than him, and I’m also doing well in my career. Fast forward to post-marriage scenario, the guy flipped completely. Suddenly, nothing I did was good enough. I was working 12-36 hour shifts when we married, and he made me feel like shit for not taking care of the house, leaving my clothes around, not cooking for him, not spending time with his mother, etc (we have always had a cook and a cleaner though),” she added. From Supportive Partner To Constant Critic She felt like nothing was ever enough for him. He often compared their lives, saying he worked harder and earned more, which made her feel unappreciated. Even though she was juggling three jobs, he called her lazy and not managing the house properly. She said she wasn’t allowed to show tiredness or frustration, as it would lead to an argument. What hurt her most was that he still showed care and patience towards his parents, who had caused problems, but showed “no empathy” towards her. “The other day, I had a headache after working 12 hours straight. He said, ‘Look at you, can’t even handle 1 day working like me.’ No affection, no how are you, nothing. The only time he pays any attention to me is when someone from the outside compliments me or if some other guy is obsessing over me. I also sometimes wonder if he is only with me for the money. I have waited for 5 years for the guy I dated to come back, but I don’t see it happening. Also, now I’ve waited for so long, I don’t know how to break it. People on the outside will blame me because he is such a handsome, self-made, well-behaved, in public kind of guy. He never cheated on me to my knowledge,” the 29-year-old further explained. F29 suffocating in my marriage. Need advise byu/Opening_Ant_6007 inAskIndianWomen Internet Says, ‘Fight For Yourself’ Reacting to the post, a user wrote, “You are old enough, financially independent, have supporting parents, why do you choose to stay in a marriage like this? You are not even 30. Fight for yourself.” Another shared, “If you need a clear mind, leave your husband’s place and move to your parents’ place. It will heal your soul and give you clarity on what needs to be done. You’re extremely lucky that you have loving and supportive parents. Use that benefit. Your parents won’t be happy seeing you struggle so much.” “It’s been 5 years already, how long do you think it will take for him to change? And how do you trust a person who flipped his entire personality and showed you his true colours after marriage? Being broke or having financial troubles or working hard hours doesn’t mean you get to be rude or nasty with your spouse,” a comment read. One more added, “3 jobs? And housework? Girl, that’s too much. That’s not even humanly possible for anyone. You need a break. You can’t take your mental and physical health for granted.” In the comments section, the woman clarified that while she doesn’t do most of the physical household chores since they have helpers for cooking and cleaning, she still carries the burden of managing everything. From planning meals to ordering groceries, the mental load remains entirely on her. She added that people often assume her life is easy because of the domestic help, but they fail to see the constant stress behind the scenes. Over time, she has realised she wants to end the marriage, calling her husband’s behaviour “controlling and manipulative”. She shared that he often acts kind only to stop her from leaving. What worries her most, she said, is that if she decides to walk away, he might play the “victim” and paint her as the “villain”.
