Copyright BuzzFeed
Neurodivergent Folks Are Sharing The Things They Experience That Neurotypical People Don't Even Think About From "brain noise" to daydream spirals to dinner rituals, neurodivergent people are sharing the little things that make their brains work differently. Most people think they know what ADHD or autism looks like. But a lot of neurodivergent experiences aren't loud or obvious. Instead, they're subtle, constant, and often dismissed as quirks or bad habits. Recently, we rounded up things neurodivergent people thought were completely normal — until they realized they weren't. In response, even more people shared the everyday things they do, feel, or struggle with that neurotypical people rarely notice. Here's what they shared: 1. "Yeah, there were definitely some missed signs, like trouble socializing and hanging out with adults way more than kids my own age. My personal favorite was from the ages of 5 to at least 12 — I read and reread fact books like National Geographic regularly to recite facts to people around me." 2. "I have no short-term memory. It takes about 72 hours for me to actually remember events or words that were said to me. I have to write everything down and be strictly scheduled in order not to screw up my life. People tend to believe that I am well put together and actually hyper-focused — my boss once complimented me and said I was the only one he saw taking notes — but I'm constantly fretting and finding things I started days ago and walked away from without completing." —purpleorc394 3. "I have a great deal of difficulty staying employed. You tell me to do something, and I will take you literally. However, experience has taught me that this isn't what you want, so I ask follow-up questions to confirm I understand. Except, you don't answer, or you get irritated with me. Or I ask for help, and you tell me, in the most patronizing way, things I already know, rather than what I was asking for. You give me feedback that doesn’t make sense to me, refuse to clarify, and conclude that I have a bad attitude." —charlieaytch 4. "Social situations were so, so hard for me. I didn't have friends and cried all the time. I held people to ironic promises — like my dad betting me a million dollars — and I snitched constantly. I always corrected people, anyone, even teachers, especially when it came to grammar. If I wanted to date or be friends with someone, I'd become obsessed with them and come off as creepy. I was a wreck. Then a friend in high school kind of adopted me, and I got mad when they said I seemed autistic. Later in college, when COVID hit, I lived with them in their apartment. They taught me how to live — and became my first love. Eventually, I went back to my own school, and heartbreak followed, but now, several years later, I'm in grad school for counseling, and I know I'm AuDHD." —lmaokay 5. "I am neurodivergent, and I find my learning style to be so different from others. I find most classes and books excruciating. After I learn something, I have to go back and write down the key details that unlocked it for me, which usually ends up being some throwaway comment glossed over by the presenter. Suffice it to say, I didn't do well in college." 6. "Child of the '60s here. I could never pay attention and had to reread everything multiple times. Not being able to sit still got me in trouble constantly because I couldn't keep quiet either. A paddling at school meant a beating at home. My mind is never quiet, even when watching TV, so I can never remember what I see — I end up rewatching the same program for months just to finish it. I was popular in school because I was nice-looking, funny, and easy to get along with, but I had a quick temper and found it hard to trust people. I still don't sleep very long or hard. I have a constant buzzing in my ears with migraines, mostly behind my eyes." "I was diagnosed with lupus after having two children, and I'm RH negative, type O. My mother was the abuser in my family — she never wanted me and told me so daily. I have a huge problem with people who lie and get away with it; it does something to me internally. Justice matters above everything." —artistichouse587 7. "Swaying back and forth a little while standing." —meganr456ce3975 8. "My son is neurodivergent and loves schedules. We have pasta every Friday, and if I don't make it, he mentions it for days. He loved school because he had a schedule." —tlkittycat 9. "The 'out of sight, out of mind' thing is real. I find it especially bad when it comes to relationships because I'm horrible at staying in contact with people. If someone isn't in my day-to-day life, I generally won't remember they exist until the next time I see them, so I never think to reach out or check in. I just don't miss people, which also makes me feel like a real asshole." 10. "Autistic here — hyper-focus mode is a thing for me. People talk about being 'in the zone,' but hyper-focus is a lot harder to snap out of. I really wondered how that didn't get on this list." —happydeer705 11. "I didn't get diagnosed with ADHD until I was in my late 30s. I spent all of my school years thinking I was lazy and a failure because I couldn’t get my papers organized, forgot about tests, and left everything for the last minute. I always tested well, so I had good grades and was in the gifted and talented program, but my executive function skills were a mess. I'm medicated now, and I work very hard to create routines and structure for myself because my natural inclination is toward chaos. Every time I think about how difficult all of those executive function things were for baby me, I wonder what it would have been like to get help earlier." —francesjoys 12. "Might be neurodivergent and/or have a chronic illness, but I have never felt seen for feeling 'I get aches and fatigue wearing normal clothes.' As soon as I get home from work or being out in public, I put on shorts that I mostly only wear at home. They don't make the same shorts anymore; otherwise, I would have more pairs." —katiejerome17 13. "A lot of this is what I have dealt with my entire life, though I wasn't diagnosed with a generalized anxiety disorder with panic attacks coupled with depressive episodes until I was nearly 19 years old. My mom had to buy me a Walkman when I was in first grade so I could listen to music before school; otherwise, I would have stomachaches that made it so I couldn't go. I always had to have some way to self-soothe in different situations, or else I just couldn't face certain things — even things I wanted to do. I would always work myself into a stomachache or some sort of panic." —grouchytable74 14. "It is physically torturous for me to wake up early, and the more sleep I get, the worse it is. No one believes me." 15. "Social justice — like being irrationally mad when people litter or treat others poorly. I thought I was just a judgmental little asshole." —lauragiped 16. "My brain low-key turns a simple conversation into somebody hating me." —nostalgiclegend284 17. "Even though I realized I was supposed to complete homework assignments in elementary school, I was incapable of making myself do it. This resulted in me repeating second grade and having my mother scold me, telling me the other children would call me a 'dummy.' Actually, nobody ever called me that, and I had a much better teacher who actually liked me, leading to a better outcome." —elizabethdelgado 18. "My boyfriend is the diet guy. He will concentrate on one type of food for weeks, and then he won't want it again for a long time. It's weird to me, but whatever floats your boat." 19. "I just learned that not everyone has constant 'brain noise' — that nonstop inner chatter or mental replay running in the background. Now, I know why my wife and I have had problems communicating over the years. I'm like, 'You don't remember a conversation we had 10 years ago, and that I've thought about a thousand times since then?' No, she hardly remembers anything. But together we are almost a whole normal (whatever that is) person." —lazboy 20. "I thought everyone was brutally honest and said what they meant and were direct with each other." –OhNoBricks 21. "I have this daydreaming thing, and I feel like it ruins my life. I thought it was my coping mechanism as a child — a way to escape my environment and pass the time when I had nothing else to do. I still do it a lot as an adult. It even happens when I'm watching something on TV or YouTube — they'll say something that triggers my thoughts to wander, and I have a hard time snapping out of it. During meetings at work, I really struggle to focus and listen unless someone is speaking directly to me. Only people who go through it, too, will understand. Others just think you're rude or uninterested, when in reality, you're stressed about it." 22. "I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD, but my daughter has. I go back and forth on whether I have it, but I thought I was insane until I learned about rejection sensitivity dysphoria. Now I know it's part of something neurodiverse in me." —jaimiec4 Neurodivergence doesn't always look like what people expect — and sometimes, the hardest parts are the ones no one else can see. If you're neurodivergent, what's something you thought was completely normal until you learned it wasn't? Share it in the comments or the anonymous form below!
