Copyright mirror
Regular readers will know that Donald Trump's allies have - particularly over the last week or so - become a lot more outspoken about the idea of him staying in power beyond 2028. Well, as of last night, he's being a lot less coy about it himself. The Donald's tour of Asia has reached Japan, where he was earlier led round a room of officials by the Prime Minister, like an elderly donkey doing circuits of Skegness beach. He then got wheeled out in front of troops on the USS George Washington, and somehow managed to avoid a lengthy bit on how he's actually a better President than George Washington, because America's founder only ended one war. The rest of it was pure Live at the Apollo, but you know, authoritarian. Meanwhile, in Trumpworld Here's everything you need to know...buckle up Trump was asked on Air Force One about Steve Bannon's claim that he will be on the ballot in the 2028 election. He claimed he hasn't really thought about a third term, but also didn't rule out staying for an illegal third term. "Well, I haven't really thought about it," he claimed. He has had hats made advertising the idea, but he hasn't really thought about it. "I have the best poll numbers I've ever had. I mean, I just solved 8 wars and a 9th is coming." Trump said there were also "very good people" in the Republican Party who could replace him on the ticket. Asked who the "very good people" were, he briefly mentioned Marco Rubio, who was standing immediately behind him, and JD Vance. But then he pivoted back to himself: "I would love to do it. I have the best numbers ever. Am I not ruling it out? You'll have to tell me." Trump gave a long and highly inappropriate speech to troops on the USS George Washington, which is stationed in Japan. The troops, to their credit, did their best to keep their poker faces on while Trump did his usual stump speech/stand-up routine. It was particularly good to hear them stony silent as he lied at length about the 2020 election being rigged and stolen from him. "You know, we won the second election by a lot, so we had to just prove it by winning the third by too big to rig I called it." Remember Mark Thompson? He used to be Director General of The BBC back in the day, before he headed stateside to head up first The New York Times and more recently being CEO of CNN. Well apparently, he visited the White House last week to promote the network's new streaming service. And according to Status News, he returned to the newsroom after his trip to the White House and urged them to "ease up" on coverage of the demolition of the East Wing. Sigh. Trump revealed on Air Force One that during his last visit to Walter Reed military hospital he underwent an MRI scan. The readout of his visit did not mention the scan specifically, only referring to "advanced imaging" scans. It's unclear why he had the procedure, but he claims it came out fine. Have you ever noticed how most of the people Trump describes as a "low IQ person" are people of colour, and more often than not, women? Weird. Anyway, on Air Force One he described Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) as a "low IQ person", before challenging her to take the same "cognitive" test he "decided" to take at Walter Reed. "The first couple of questions are easy. A tiger, an elephant, a giraffe," he said. What he's describing appears to be the Montreal Cognitive Assessment, a widely used test for detecting cognitive impairment - dementia and Alzheimer's disease. As a man over 75, it's not unusual for him to take such a test during a medical exam. But it would be weird for a woman in her mid-30s to do so. Also, the animals you have to name on the test are a lion, a rhinoceros and a camel, not a tiger an elephant and a giraffe... Yikes. If there's one thing Donald Trump has in common with the Insane Clown Posse (Google it), it's an uhealthy mistrust of magnets. During his speech to the troops, for reasons that remain unclear, started complaining about lifts being operated by magnets instead of winches and cables. "Hydraulic for your elevators, or magnets? The new thing is magnets, so instead of using hydraulic which you can be hit by lightning and it's fine, you take a little glass of water and you drop it on magnets and I don't know what's going to happen." Water, for the record, does not affect magnets. Magnets can work when completely submerged in water. He also asked the crowd whether they preferred the catapults on their aircraft carriers to be powered by electricity or...steam. Can't imagine why he would have been given a cognitive test. Please enjoy this video of a decidedly wobbly looking Donald Trump being led around a room by the Prime Minister of Japan, occasionally stopping and saluting for no apparent reason. Remember the other day, when we mentioned Trump had inflated the investment figures to a whopping $20 trillion - two thirds of the entire GDP of the United States? Well, apparently that wasn't obviously nonsense enough for the Donald, because in his speech to the troops he tacked on another TRILLION dollars. According to Fox News, a mass firing of ICE leadership is underway across America. As many as 12 field office chiefs - including leaders in Denver, LA, Phoenix, and Philadelphia - are reportedly being reassigned in a bid to boost deportation numbers. The purge is supposedly being overseen by Corey Lewandowski - a long time Trump orbiter and conspiracy theorist who is very close to Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem. It seems likely that the heavy handed tactics we've seen from ICE so far are likely to get a whole lot more heavy and random. An ICE agent has been accused of pointing a gun at someone protesting against ICE in Chicago last week. According to court documents, the officer said: "Bang bang," and "you're dead, liberal". The complainant was unarmed and not engaged in any unlawful activity, according to the filing. All of this is extremely reassuring. The Department of Homeland Security's Twitter account, which regular readers will recall has been a bit...edgy of late, has done it again. And this time they're co-opting Master Chief. The account last night Tweeted a graphic under the caption "Finishing this fight". The graphic features a picture of Master Chief, the hero from the video game Halo, driving a Warthog (armoured jeep) with text that reads: "Destroy the flood, join ICE." In Halo, the flood are a marauding species of fast-moving subhuman zombie creatures, just in case you needed the horrific metaphor spelled out for you. Oh hey, Elon's back at it again. His "Grokipedia" - an attempt to rival Wikipedia with a right wing reassessment of facts - has gone live, and it's every bit as mad as you might expect. For those wondering, apparently Gamergate actually was about ethics in video game journalism, and not about men hating and abusing women. The entry on George Floyd includes details of his criminal record in the first sentence, none of which was known to the police officers who killed him by kneeling on his neck.
