Although many viewers claim The Big Bang Theory’s Penny settled for Leonard, this reading of the series fundamentally misunderstands the show’s entire point. By The Big Bang Theory’s finale, it is fair to say that the series had changed a lot since its premiere. Part of this was due to a broader cultural shift.
Howard’s sleazy come-ons weren’t as funny in a post-MeToo cultural environment, and The Big Bang Theory’s most problematic episode aged terribly thanks to its sympathetic portrayal of his objectification of women. As such, the onetime wannabe Casanova became a devoted dad and loving husband.
However, other changes had more to do with the show itself. Returning to The Big Bang Theory’s pilot, it is striking to see just how much Leonard and Penny’s potential romance was the engine driving the story and its conflicts, while Jim Parsons’s Sheldon was mostly just along for the ride.
Parsons’s character became such a firm fan favorite that, by around season 8, he had become the show’s de facto lead. Much like Urkel from Family Matters or Barney from How I Met Your Mother, this breakout character’s popularity ended up overshadowing the show’s original protagonist. As a result, Penny and Leonard’s love story is sometimes sidelined.
The Big Bang Theory Highlighted Penny and Leonard’s Differences
Penny Was More Socially Adept While Leonard Was A Scientific Genius
This is a shame, since Penny and Leonard’s romance is still one of the show’s most compelling throughlines. Admittedly, the pair could have ended up together for good earlier on, and they weathered maybe one too many breakups in their “will they, won’t they “stage. However, the chemistry between Johnny Galecki and Kaley Cuoco remained charming throughout the series.
This did not stop some viewers from complaining that, in the end, Penny settled for Leonard. This viewpoint didn’t come from nowhere, as the characters on the show constantly commented on how Leonard was lucky to be with Penny throughout their relationship. That said, this idea does undermine the ostensible premise of The Big Bang Theory.
Penny was more conventionally attractive, while Leonard was more financially successful. Penny was also more socially adept and charming, whereas Leonard was more of a socially maladroit nerd. Similarly, Leonard was more academically gifted, whereas Penny initially struggled with advanced adult learning.
There was an obvious “opposites attract” appeal to this pairing, but reducing the pair’s relationship to nothing more than an unlikely duo discards the work that both characters did in growing to love each other. Throughout the show’s 12 seasons, The Big Bang Theory’s Penny gained an appreciation for science and a genuine love of comic books.
Similarly, Leonard developed much more confidence and emotional fluency, going from an awkward, immature character who couldn’t even tell Penny he liked her to a self-possessed adult ready to have serious conversations about parenthood and commitment. Leonard came out of his shell while Penny explored her nerdy side, things neither character would have done without the other.
Penny and Leonard Didn’t “Settle For” Each Other
Neither Partner Could Have Done Better, Which Was The Show’s Point
That is, of course, the somewhat sappy “love conquers all” reading of the pair. However, that’s only half the story. The reality is Penny and Leonard themselves played into the narrative of Penny settling for Leonard, and this encouraged the perception among viewers. However, it also actively harmed their relationship.
The claim that one of them settled maintains the idea that couples should be more similar than Penny and Leonard, which the entire show theoretically debunked. Leonard wasn’t as tall or young as Penny, but Penny also wasn’t as invested in the future world of physics as he was. The sitcom seemed to suggest that these things don’t necessarily matter.
That said, The Big Bang Theory constantly undermined this idea with snide jokes about Penny ending up with someone else, and these took a surprising toll on the pair’s relationship. In one of The Big Bang Theory’s worst episodes, Leonard effectively told Penny she couldn’t take a promising job because it involved working with her handsome himbo ex-boyfriend Zack.
To be fair, the remainder of the episode sees Leonard apologize and eventually concede that Penny should take the job if it’s what she wants, but its ending then seemingly proves him right when Zack reveals that his own fiancée wasn’t comfortable with him working with Penny. The implication of this gag is actually surprisingly sad.
Leonard openly tells his wife that he believes she might cheat on him if given the opportunity, and Zack’s fiancée says the same, and both Penny and Zack are seemingly expected to laugh this off. It’s a cruel and unpleasant thing to share with an ostensible loved one.
However, because The Big Bang Theory reinforced the idea that Penny was settling for Leonard, his paranoia is not only justified but seemingly reasonable. The fact that Penny might be too decent and morally upright to cheat on her husband doesn’t even merit consideration, and nor does the idea that she might be more attracted to the man she married than Zack.
The Big Bang Theory’s Penny and Leonard Didn’t Help Themselves
The Characters Constantly Joked About Penny Settling For Leonard
The Big Bang Theory itself mined a lot of laughs from Penny settling for Leonard, but that came at a cost to the characters. For example, Leonard was the one who once cheated on Penny, but he was still seemingly justified in his distrust of his wife despite her faithfulness.
Leonard used the idea of Penny settling for him to justify his poor treatment of Penny more than once, while Penny’s jokes about Leonard further justified his jealousy. Even though Leonard was the only one who was actually unfaithful, both Leonard and Penny suffered as a result of validating this narrative in The Big Bang Theory.
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