By Lucy John
Copyright walesonline
When Mercedes Stephens first met Robert Dumazel he presented himself as “special”. He promised her the world and reassured her that he would never let anyone hurt her. She could have never foreseen that several months later she would feel so terrified of him that she wondered: “Is he going to be the one to kill me?” During their eight-month relationship Dumazel threw mirrors at her, hit her, followed her, and stopped her from leaving the house. He called her names, he smashed up her car, he chased her in public, and he put down her family and friends. He stripped Mercedes of her independence and self-worth so severely that she felt trapped, worthless, and scared during her many attempts at leaving him. It led to her losing her job as well as her friends and support network. Spiteful Dumazel’s behaviour was fuelled by his own insecurities, becoming jealous about men Mercedes knew before the pair had even met. On Tuesday Dumazel, 24, found himself in the dock at Cardiff Crown Court for the abuse he subjected her to. He received a suspended sentence and celebrated outside the court afterwards, smiling and putting his fists in the air. Don’t miss a court report by signing up to our crime newsletter here . Since the police became involved and the relationship ended in April 2024 Mercedes said she feels “so much happier” and like she has “a reason to live”. The 20-year-old from Penarth has bravely opened up to WalesOnline about what happened in the hope that it will empower other survivors of domestic abuse to seek help and to encourage other men to call out such behaviour. “We need to start holding these people accountable,” she said. “Regardless of whether it is your brother, friend, uncle, or son.” Around two months after the pair met Mercedes, then 18, said Dumazel, then 22, became physically violent towards her. He promised “it would never happen again,” she said, but in reality the abuse intensified. She said: “I was on my iPad watching something and I passed the iPad to him so he could watch. He then saw messages sent [before I met him]. “He then pushed me off the bed, pushed the bedside desk [with a mirror] on me, and then he kicked me several times to the head. “He apologised and said that he just saw red and said it would never happen again. “Really ever since then there was some form of abuse every day whether that was psychological or physical. “He was very manipulative. He made me feel like he loved me so much and that’s why he acted in this way.” This incident left Mercedes with significant bruising to her legs. On another occasion in December 2023 Mercedes explained that Dumazel became violent when a boy unexpectedly called her phone from a withheld number. She said: “He grabbed my head and hit it against a wall which led to me feeling sick and being sick. I ended up having two days off work because I felt unwell.” She said this led to her losing her job that she had worked hard for and loved. She said: “I used to work selling new-builds for a company and I was very proud of myself – I was only 18. “Mostly during that job I was having him calling me and messaging me, asking why I hadn’t replied, being on my case. I didn’t feel I could focus on the job properly. “They let me go due to being unreliable.” When Mercedes made attempts to find a new job she said Dumazel became enraged because it meant she might work with men. She said he stopped her from pursuing these jobs by using violence and locking her in the house. He said: “He threw a mirror at me because I had had an interview for a job at a car dealership where he used to work. “Because of the males who worked there he said I couldn’t work there. “I had been successful in the car dealership interview and was offered an induction day and said I would take that if that was successful. “And he threw a mirror at me (at her head) out of rage. There had been another interview that he did not let me attend at all. “I still accepted the induction day which was going to be for another day in the future but he locked me in the house so I couldn’t go to it.” The incident with the mirror left Mercedes with a nasty cut on her head. There were other occasions when Dumazel left the house with her car keys to prevent her from leaving. During one instance Mercedes asked if she could go out with her friends to Wetherspoon in Barry . To this Dumazel replied: “If you go to Barry ‘spoons I will ruin your life.” Due to the fear this instilled in Mercedes she did not go to meet her friends. Mercedes said she tried to leave Dumazel many times but explained for people in that situation it can be extremely challenging to do so without support. She described herself as being “incredibly manipulated”. She explained: “My independence was taken away and that is the main reason I depended on him “He made me feel like nobody was there for me – not even my friends or family. That they didn’t care about me as much as he did. He would put them down and call them names. “He would make me feel like I was the problem… Almost as though he had a reason to hit me. “I felt almost like it was him or nobody. Like nobody loved me apart from him. He would lovebomb me massively. He would give me the princess treatment in between the abuse. It would never last long but there were two extremes. “[The first few times] I tried to leave him I felt like it was the worst idea and I felt like my friends weren’t there for me but in reality it was because he had put a bad idea in my head. I would tell myself: ‘He isn’t the bad person – it’s me’.” Mercedes described one particularly disturbing incident that happened one night after she tried to leave Dumazel in March 2024. She said: “I parked at the barrage car park [in Cardiff Bay ] after I had called it quits with him that day. I had gone to the car park because I was upset and I wanted to compose myself. “While I was there I was turning off my location [on various apps] so he would not be able to find me but one of the apps displayed your most recent location even after you turned it off. “He turned up, pulled up behind my car, and was accusing me of being with boys. I told him I hadn’t been. “He had his hand in his pants and took out a metal tow hook which made me feel really concerned and then he threatened to smash my kneecaps in with it. “And then he smashed two vents inside my car, he smashed my door card, and when he got out he smashed the window of my door while I was in the car. There was glass all over the seat. He then drove off. “On this occasion I genuinely thought I would be put in hospital with a very serious injury. I was in complete shock.” But the ordeal didn’t end there. Mercedes said she drove to a quiet car park nearby in an attempt to hide away from Dumazel but said he noticed her lights and pulled in. She said: “He was looking for me and where I was stopped you could see it from the road. He saw my lights and he turned in “He was trying to get my phone from me to have a look. I knew I had nothing on there that was bad but he would find old messages or old photos from before I met him and get angry about those. So I was stressed about him getting hold of my phone because of that. “He managed to get my phone and saw some casual messages from while we were on a break and got angry at me. “I got out of the car and ran onto a field because he has a thing about trainers and I knew he wouldn’t want to get his trainers dirty so he wouldn’t follow me on to the field.” Eventually Mercedes said she realised there was no way to get out of the situation and she walked towards her car. She said as she approached Dumazel he got her into his car and “grabbed and hit” her before driving off. “I was trapped,” she said. “He said: ‘Show me your phone’ and I wouldn’t. Either way I was going to get abused.” During the incident Dumazel hit Mercedes on her nose and her cheek which led to heavy bleeding. Disgustingly he told her: “You had better not get blood on my car.” Mercedes said: “That time I was crying and I felt like I was genuinely going to faint. I was on the verge of passing out. “The pain really hit the next day. He took me to hospital the next day because my car was so smashed up. “I told the hospital that I had gotten into a fight with a girl at a club because he was with me the whole time. They were asking me questions but he said: ‘You don’t have to answer that.’”. Mercedes said Dumazel was scared of her mother finding out about what he had done so he “kept [her] in his house for two weeks”. He put her car in his garage and “made” her pay for someone to fix it, she said. The final incident came on April 24, 2024, when the pair were separated. Dumazel turned up at Mercedes’ house asking for his belongings. She said: “I put all his clothes in a pile for him on the bed. “He started kicking off saying: ‘Who have you been with?’ and asking if I had been back with my old boyfriend and asked about boys I had on social media. “Because he knew I wasn’t biting back he started crying and saying he’s had the worst week of his life. “I made it clear that I wasn’t going to get back with him and he took my glasses off my head and stamped on them. He then pulled down my light. “My mum didn’t know at this point and because she was coming back home I shooed him out into his car and then he started driving. “He spiralled with jealousy and was trying to get my phone off me. He was grabbing my head and trying to use my face to unlock my phone. He was shoving my head into the window. “He then pulled into the Llandough area and as he was trying to get my phone he split my lip. I started pouring blood all down my face.” Mercedes said she convinced Dumazel to drive her to a public place, promising she would then show him her phone if he did. However her plan was to run and get help. She said: “He drove me to Cosmeston Lakes. As soon as he pulled over I jumped out of the car and started running. “People were watching and they said nothing. I had blood all down my face and my chest and he was chasing me. It was in the daytime around 11am. “I tried to call the police but because the chase was ongoing I couldn’t focus on that. “He grabbed me by the arm while people were still watching. He dragged me into his car as he was saying: ‘You’re crazy. I’m taking you back to your mum’ so the public wouldn’t take notice. “He took me back to his house. I sat in his house crying and he slapped me four times to the face. In these situations I just had to wait it out until it eventually came to an end.” Mercedes said it was after this incident the police became aware of the abuse. She said: “He took me to the hospital and that’s how the police got involved. “My friend saw that my location was at the hospital and saw that I was with him and she called the police. “It was a strange ending because my mum turned up at the hospital and told him to leave, which he did, and then I panicked. He made me feel as though he was the only person I had and so ran after him. “Eventually the police arrested him and he was put on bail.” Mercedes said she is so thankful to her friend who phoned the police. She said: “I am now so grateful that my friend reported him but at the time I was so upset as I felt she had taken the one thing I had from me. But now I get it and I am so glad she did do it. “The reason I didn’t report it was because I feared it would get worse if I reported it. I didn’t fully understand the process of what would happen if I did report it. “And I didn’t want to lose him. He made me feel crazy and I thought he might manipulate [the police into believing him instead of me] and I felt like the problem.” However Mercedes said the police believed her straightaway, which helped her to open up about what happened and finally stop the cycle of abuse. Dumazel, of Barberry Rise in Cogan, was sentenced on Tuesday for one count of coercive control and two counts of actual bodily harm against Mercedes. He was sentenced to 20 months in prison suspended for two years. Outside the court Dumazel was seen by WalesOnline celebrating with his hands in the air. Mercedes said: “I wasn’t massively happy with the sentencing as I do believe it was definitely worth [an immediate] custodial sentence.” Reaching out to other survivors of abuse Mercedes said: “Since it ended I have definitely built my friendships back up. I started opening up about it. “Romantic relationships I’m not in a rush for – I now have trust issues. “I’m back doing what I love doing, selling new-builds for a new company. I have lots of friends again now. “I am so much happier and I have so much motivation and I have a reason to live now that isn’t him. “I would urge anyone in my situation to report it if they safely can.” If you or someone you know is affected by domestic abuse visit the Live Fear Free website or call the helpline on 0808 80 10 800.
