Copyright thenationonlineng
Says husband had four wives, but they never quarrelled Recalls how her doctor’s mother saved her from operation with raw vegetables during childbirth Speaking with her on the phone, it is difficult to reckon that Madam Victoria Ayoka Makoyawo (nee Adebowale) is 100 years old. Her sharp and audible voice is at odds with her centenary status. Also remarkable is her ability to accurately recall events. The centenarian shares her life experiences in a conversation with GBENGA ADERANTI. Excerpts: How do you feel clocking the rare age of 100 years? I thank God for His grace, which has enabled me to be 100 years old and for my life. I give praise to Jesus. It has been a long journey in life. Considering that formal education was not fashionable at the time you were born, how did you manage to go to school? I lived with my maternal grandmother. My dad was a farmer, and he did not send any of his children to school. However, my maternal grandmother wanted me to have a formal education. I was therefore taken from Abeokuta to Imeko in 1935. That was where I started formal education. It is also important to mention that it was a white man who did the confirmation for me, which is why I have Victoria as part of my name. Was it at Imeko that you completed your education? From Imeko, we returned to Osogbo, where I continued with my education. I still remember vividly that our school fees were about twelve and a half kobo. After a while, I told my mum that I was not ready to continue with my education because of the ordeal I was facing with paying the school fees. My mum kicked, but I opted to learn sewing. Fortunately for me, my maternal grandmother’s brother was in Ibadan, where I stayed and learnt how to make dresses. I thank God that He blessed this sewing business. I later got married in 1949. Not long after, my husband was transferred to Ilorin, and we later returned to Lagos. God answered my prayer, and in 1949, I had my first child. After the first child, I had a delay. I tried to have another child, but it was a bit difficult. I was so desperate to the extent that any time I saw a woman who had just given birth, I would say, ‘loan me your husband for me to have a child too,’ and everybody would laugh. The delay in not having another child after the first one was causing me so much grief. After waiting for about 13 years, God answered my prayer and I had a baby girl In fact, when I got pregnant I didn’t even know. I remember that I went to Sapele to meet a family member. There, I couldn’t eat; I was just vomiting. I suspected that I was pregnant, and it was later confirmed that I was pregnant. What were the things on your mind during the waiting period? I was always telling God the kind of child I wanted. I specifically asked God to give me a female child who would be kind and would not disgrace me. I enjoyed good treatment during that pregnancy. A doctor was detailed to look after me where my husband was. Another doctor was engaged in Lagos to look after me until I was put to bed. You just said that God blessed your sewing business… Yes, I was doing well in my sewing business. Although I was staying in Mushin, Lagos, people on the Lagos Island knew me. I would go from Mushin to Tom Jones, Lagos Island, and to sew for people. It was there I came in contact with many people. Ileya Festival was always a boom period for me. Read Also: ‘Nigeria’s real problem is attitude, not politics’ I think the secret behind this was the fact that I was honest with my clients. I never cheated any of them, and I would never keep part of their clothes. I always remembered what my boss told me as an apprentice. She said we should not take what was not ours. So, when I started my own business, it was my principle, and all my clients knew this. Secondly, I love to work. I hate staying idle. It wasn’t only sewing that I was doing; I was into other businesses too. I was into building and supplying building materials. I was a contractor at Ikeja Police College when it was about to start. The name of my business then was Victoria Building Contractor. I was a supplier there, supplying them with quality materials. Even the people I was buying things from knew I would not take anything inferior. My policy was that dirty or cursed money was no money. I was only interested in clean business. I never knew that some of the policemen were watching me and monitoring what I was doing. Although I was involved in other businesses which God really blessed, I also sold clothing materials. I just love to work; I can’t sit idle. I also sold food in this house. Many lawyers were coming here to eat. It was a business that fetched me so much money, too. I love to work; my paternal and maternal families believe in hard work, and that was what I imbibed. What did you do with the proceeds of your business? Ah, you know I told you earlier how I encouraged my husband to build his personal house and his reluctance. When he was delaying, I just took one of his brothers to his land. I did a foundation for him, we started, and we were paying block makers whatever we had. It was one of the visits to the person who sold the land to my husband that I expressed my interest in buying land, too. He initially refused to sell land to me because he felt I should have got married to either Egba or Oyo instead of an Ekiti man (laughs). Unknown to me, the owner of the piece of land was my father’s friend. Unfortunately, it was too late, and the land had been sold. But as God would have it, the people at the town planning said there was a piece of land in another place belonging to the same man. But it was small. I had to run back to Abeokuta, and he confirmed what they told me in Lagos. I insisted that, irrespective of the size, I would buy it. He said he would have given me the land free of charge, but said again that because I married an Ekiti man, he would not do so. He eventually sold the land to me. That is where I am living today, in the heart of Ikeja. You were married to a polygamist. What was your experience? I was the fourth wife. Except you were told, it would be difficult for anyone to know that we were married to the same man. Anytime I went to Abeokuta, I would buy food and other things, I would cook, and all of us would sit down and eat. Most of our neighbours thought we rented the house, not knowing we were the wives of the owner of the house. The feeling then was that we were just friends. Till all the other wives died, we never quarrelled. How did you manage to live without having issues with your husband’s other wives? (Prolonged laughter) I remember telling my husband not to keep concubines. If he found any woman who caught his fancy, he should bring the person home and marry her. Then, we were told that women were killing men in Lagos. I’m amazed at the way you remember things and events. You are still looking strong, and your voice is like that of a teenager. What is the secret? I will attribute these to God. He gave me the power. Also, it was the kind of upbringing that I had. Every Sunday, after returning from church, we would go in and start reading the Bible. That too must have contributed to it. For example, we never joked with pap. I used to feel sad then if I did not drink pap and senke. How would you compare the Lagos of today with the one you grew up in? Things have really changed. There was no traffic jam or noise then. There was no kidnapping. The Lagos of then was stress-free. If you look at your 100 years on earth, what would you say gave you the greatest joy, and what made you saddest? There was a day I was taking my daughter to school together with one of my younger ones’ children, with my driver. We had an accident, and I was just shouting Jesus! Jesus! It was a sad experience. My most joyous moment was when I was in labour and the doctor told me that the baby was breech. Fortunately, the doctor’s mum was around. When she heard what happened, she plucked vegetable leaves in the hospital and told me to start chewing the vegetables raw. I gave birth to the baby safely. The greatest joy was when I realised that it was a baby girl. I asked God for a baby girl, and He hearkened to my request. They told me not to stand up from the bed. I was just shouting I thank you, Jesus, I thank you, Jesus. They all rejoiced. How were you treated by your in-laws during your waiting period, I mean, before the second child came? Not bad, I was just telling God that I never asked him for a delay. At a point, you went to Jerusalem… Yes, I had been to Austria before then. My trip to Jerusalem was not planned. I used to have a friend, but she is late now. My wrapper used to be a flowing one touching the floor, because of that, many of them used to call me alhaja. I would tell her I’m not an alhaja. In one of those days when I returned to Nigeria from a business trip to Austria, she said she had submitted my name among those who would go to Jerusalem. We eventually went. In Jerusalem, I started praying. My friend reminded me that it was good to speak positively; that it was almost 30 years since I said I was not an alhaja but alhaja of Jerusalem, and that God had answered my prayer, which I had eventually become alhaja of Jerusalem. I then thanked God. In Jerusalem, I requested God… before I left Nigeria; I was selling food and alcoholic drinks. I said that if I returned to Nigeria, I would not sell alcoholic drinks again because I did not want my child to be drinking alcohol; therefore, I would not sell alcoholic drinks to the children of other people. When I returned, I stopped selling drinks. The girl working with me asked why. I said nothing. I sold all the crates and started dealing in Coca-Cola drinks and Vitamalt. Would you advise a woman to marry into a polygamous home or a man to practice polygamy? I don’t want it. I don’t support it because of the challenges involved. I don’t pray for any of my family members to have more than one wife, because they won’t have a restful mind. The people of those days knew how to manage polygamy, but this generation is incapable. What would you tell the newlyweds? A woman needs a lot of patience. I would advise women to take good care of their husbands. Unfortunately, wives nowadays prefer takeaway and fast food for their husbands. Some go as far as contracting their stew out. They don’t do all those things that matter for their husbands. They don’t know how to cook. I pray that God will give them the wisdom and the skills to do the right things for their husbands. The most important thing is for the woman to be patient. We know that both of them come from different backgrounds, but patience is the key. Women have to be submissive.
