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DEAR ABBY: I have read your column for 40 years. Now I have an issue. I have been taking care of my wife’s uncle for the last two years. He had a stroke, and I became a certified nursing assistant. I stay home and take care of him 24/7. My wife does not help. Recently, her sister decided to return to college to finish her RN and moved in with us. She does not help at all. I decided to go back to school to get my master’s. I work 60 hours a week and also work on my master’s in cybersecurity. I told my wife that if her sister doesn’t move out by the end of the year, I am moving out. We are putting her uncle back in a nursing home. I CANNOT DO IT ANYMORE. In the last two years, I have had only four days off. When I had the flu, no laundry was done. Am I a bad person for wanting a career? Am I a bad person for wanting a house with just my wife and me? —Exhausted in the East Dear Exhausted: It was loving and generous of you to enroll in classes to become a CNA so you could give your wife’s uncle the care he needed. That she did nothing to lighten your burden, and then invited her sister to move in without first clearing it with you, was wrong. Marriage is supposed to be a partnership, and it appears you have been doing all the heavy lifting. You are not a bad person for wanting a career and the financial benefits it will bring, and you should not be made to feel guilty for it. Stories by Abigail Van Buren Dear Abby: Should I skip my friend’s wedding over this? Dear Abby: I lost my child — how do I handle everyday conversations now? Dear Abby: Family torn apart after grandson cuts contact Dear Abby: My husband hates how I shop for holiday gifts — am I wrong? Dear Abby: My niece read my private text to her mom — now we’re not talking Read more Dear Abby and other advice columns.
