As Constance Marie approached her 60th birthday, she had an idea to celebrate the major life milestone.
The actor — known for her roles in “George Lopez,” “American Family,” “Selena” and “With Love” — didn’t want to throw just any party. She wanted to reclaim and learn more about her Mexican culture, while at the same time uplifting her Latino community and raising money for organizations important to her.
That’s when she decided to throw a sesentañera, a take on the popular coming-of-age quinceañera party thrown for young women who turn 15.
Celebrated much like a Sweet Sixteen throughout Latin America and the U.S., a quinceañera marks a 15-year-old girl’s passage from girlhood to womanhood. In Marie’s case, she multiplied it by four to embrace entering a new decade in her life.
“I had never been to a quinceañera. Nobody in my family has ever been to one. Nobody in my family has ever had one,” Marie tells TODAY.com. “Ever since we did an episode on the ‘George Lopez’ show where my character throws a quinceañera for my (on-screen) daughter Masiela, I thought, ‘Oh, my God, this is the coolest thing! I didn’t know we could do this!’ My family didn’t come from any money or means, so we didn’t even think about it.”
Marie says she can trace her family back to 1853 when they were living in New Mexico. However, throughout generations, she felt like much of their history and culture was stripped away. She, as well as her mother, didn’t grow up speaking Spanish.
“We didn’t cross the border. The border crossed us,” she says. “And along those generations, so many of the cultural touchstones, like Spanish and the traditions, were quietly stolen or robbed from us because we had to assimilate.”
Her work as an actor, she says, has given her the opportunity to celebrate her culture, and review and learn those cultural touchstones that she never grew up with. But she still feels like she has much to absorb.
For her sesentañera, she says she spent “hours and hours” on YouTube learning about quinceañera traditions, including wearing an elegant formal dress, the crowning and shoe ceremony to symbolize entering womanhood, and a special dance. Marie didn’t grow up “crazy religious,” she says, so she didn’t incorporate the Catholic mass and blessings.
“I’m 60 years old. I have survived so much and I can make this what I want it to be,” she says. “So I took what worked for me.”
Marie began documenting the preparation for her sesentañera on Instagram, including going dress shopping at Rosy’s Bridal in Los Angeles. She says the shop had just experienced an immigration raid by ICE, and she wanted to support the business in the aftermath. Her followers also saw her pick out her heels and accessories, as well as getting ready for her Sept. 26 party and snippets from the main event.
When it came time for her big reveal, she donned an elegant red dress, inspired by Disney’s first ever Latina princess, Elena of Avalor. Marie happened to voice the character of Doña Paloma in the animated series.
“I just remember being at Disneyland and seeing — oh, it’s going to make me cry — seeing a Latina princess and her red beautiful dress. And I thought, ‘Oh, my God, I have to honor this,’” she says, adding that the color’s brightness and boldness gave her confidence.
She then changed into sneakers and a black dress for her “baile sorpresa,” or surprise dance, which included participation of friends and fellow actors Gina Torres, Lisa Vidal, Angelique Cabral and Diana Maria Riva.
Also included in her festivities was a “beautiful speech” given by her 16-year-old daughter, Luna. “I was so taken aback by that,” Marie reflects. “Sixteen is hard for a young girl, especially with mothers and daughters, but I had to work so hard to not ugly cry and embarrass her because it just made me realize, ‘Oh, my gosh, she does see me, and I am having a positive impact on her even in these difficult years.’ So that was just so incredibly rewarding.”
There was also a heartwarming moment where Marie had her “showbiz children” on the dance floor with her.
“I just wanted to celebrate them as well, because they are the future of our representation,” she says. She adds that after 40 years in the entertainment community, “I’ve gotten so much feedback from everyone saying, ‘I grew up with you. Your role as a mother inspired me, or your role as a deaf mother inspired my mother to learn sign language.’ It’s just so amazing the impact that we can have.”
She says her on-screen kids (which included Francia Raisa, Emeraude Toubia, Masiela Lusha and others) from her past projects are not only “talented and so wonderful,” they’ve truly taught her and made her a better actor and performer.
Among other stand-out moments from the party included a performance by the all-female Mariachi Santa Monica group that sang Selena Quintanilla songs, food catered by La Nena Cantina, Don Julio tequila and a custom-made Loteria card of Marie in her red gown by Viridiana Osio.
While the party aspect of it was a delight, Marie says she wanted to go one step further. She decided to raise awareness and funds for the organizations This Is About Humanity and Immigrant Defenders Law Center. Both nonprofits work together to raise money for immigrant communities who need help, including shelter, legal assistance, food and more.
“I just thought, ‘OK, if I’m going to do this, I’m going to do this for something that’s bigger than me,’” she says. “These two organizations, I have worked with over the years and they are truly angels. They truly do make an impact on so many levels, for our community and for the undocumented immigrants.”
The sesentañera was a night to remember, and one that made Marie reflect on the importance of celebrating one’s Latinidad. She also stresses the fact that it’s never too late to discover more about your heritage and ancestry.
“I say to any other women out there: Go have your special day, no matter what it looks like. Quinceañera, bat mitzvah — they should have older bat mitzvahs. Why not?” she says. “You didn’t get your day? Celebrate, reclaim! If it’s your flower ceremony or whatever, I just think we have to be courageous enough to hope right now, and celebrate and uplift. That’s what I was trying to do, and I really, truly urge anybody else to do the same thing.”