By Besha Rodell

Copyright brisbanetimes

There are two things that I’m known for ranting about. One is why we, as a species, are so obsessed with intelligent life on other planets when we haven’t yet learned to communicate with octopuses. The other is breakfast sandwiches.

I contend that approximately 90 per cent of Australian breakfast sandwiches are ruined by some kind of tomato jam. Tomato jam is too sweet. Besides, when they’re good, tomatoes themselves are delicious. People should use fresh tomato or no tomato. The best breads for breakfast sandwiches are often not the ones used – I prefer a southern American-style biscuit or an English muffin. Australia’s McMuffins are spoiled by the meat. I could go on.

So it’s funny that the best breakfast sandwich in Melbourne – one that meets all of my ridiculous requirements – is being served at a restaurant that isn’t open for breakfast.