By Devlina Sarkar
Copyright newsweek
More than a match, the Ryder Cup is where lifelong memories and legacies are created.
It’s the raw reactions from players, crowds and their families on the course that define the experience, especially after a win or loss. Except when it’s a defeat, the experience could be haunting, as experienced by Xander Schauffele and Matt Fitzpatrick’s parents, who decided to skip their visit to Bethpage Black for that very reason.
FARMINGDALE, NEW YORK – SEPTEMBER 26: Fans arrive for the Friday morning foursomes matches of the 2025 Ryder Cup at Black Course at Bethpage State Park Golf Course on September 26, 2025 in Farmingdale, New York. (Photo by Carl Recine/Getty Images)
The incident came to light when Schauffele’s father, Stefan, who’s also been his longtime coach, shared his thoughts with The Times, stating, “Do I miss the PGA Tour? No. I’m not going to the Ryder Cup either.”
Stefan’s words were a reaction to not one but two sour moments, one of which included Rory McIlroy’s heated exchange with Patrick Cantlay’s caddie, Joe LaCava, during the 2023 Ryder Cup.
The incident unfolded after caddie LaCava waved his hat after a dramatic putt by Cantlay on the 18th at Rome. McIlroy found it disruptive during his routine, and the argument spilled into the parking lot.
“That was utterly disgusting … Rory behaved disgustingly in my opinion,” Stefan told The Times. “It’s ruined my appetite for the Ryder Cup. It becomes unwatchable.”
The other incident unfolded when the fans abused Shane Lowry’s wife in front of him. “I’m afraid of what’s going to happen in New York,” Schauffele’s dad said, as quoted by The Times. “I was there (at Whistling Straits) when they called Shane Lowry’s wife a w—e in front of him. I couldn’t believe my ears.”
Matt Fitzpatrick’s parents faced a similar experience
The decision from his parents, Russell and Susan, to skip Bethpage Black was also rooted in a past experience.
During the Ryder Cup match at Whistling Straits, a fan reportedly shouted, “Slit his throat, Berger,” right in front of them when Fitzpatrick lost all three matches against Team USA.
FARMINGDALE, NEW YORK – SEPTEMBER 26: Matt Fitzpatrick of Team Europe lines up a putt on the 11th green during the Friday morning foursomes matches of the 2025 Ryder Cup at Black Course at Bethpage State Park Golf Course on September 26, 2025 in Farmingdale, New York. (Photo by Richard Heathcote/Getty Images)
That moment still bothers his parents. “I left it completely up to them,” Fitzpatrick told reporters ahead of this year’s Ryder Cup. “They didn’t have a great experience in Whistling Straits. That’s not like a lie or anything or making anything up.”
While their upcoming participation in the Dunhill Links Championship also played a role, Fitzpatrick made it clear the emotional toll was real.
“They also didn’t really want to ruin that experience as well, because that’s obviously special to have,” he added during the same conversation. “So yeah, it’s a combination. It’s a lot of travel. It’s obviously a busy week. It’s a tiring week. And then they obviously want to have a nice week next week as well with me and my brother.”
The three-time Ryder Cup player expressed he’ll miss their presence but absolutely respects their choice.
“They have obviously been to a lot,” he said, as quoted in a transcript. “But I’m fine with that. They have been to three Ryder Cups already … They have seen me in all sorts of events.”
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