State troopers knocked on the front door of the Parker family home that morning in 2010 with the news that 18-year-old Arielle had been killed in a car accident not far from her college campus.
The daughter, sister and Grimsley graduate was just days from starting her freshman year at Wingate University on Aug. 14, 2010.
For her mom, Djuana Parker, and dad, James Parker, it was the beginning of a soul-crushing journey.
Out of it also came the nonprofit Ari’s Heart — The Arielle Parker Foundation, which is hosting the upcoming ” Hope Beyond Heartache” free summit for survivors of a traumatic loss. The summit is from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Oct. 18, at Grace United Methodist Church on Friendly Avenue. Lunch is provided but seating is limited. The Christian-based support seminar is designed to offer practical coping tools, a supportive community and strength through faith.
With model good looks and a quiet presence around strangers, Arielle had a depth and spirituality. She often ended up ministering through social media to young people, especially those who were hurting.
“It’s been a long and challenging journey since the loss of my precious daughter” Parker said. “Grief is a deeply personal experience, and I found myself navigating through a mix of emotions and reflections. I dug deeper into my relationship with God and leaned on my circle of family and friends to make it. I have also realized that sharing my story and connecting with others could be powerful.”
Now, 15 years later, she wanted to do more. Both she and her husband are Christian ministers.
“Over the years, people have frequently reached out to my husband and me, seeking support and guidance as they navigate their own journeys of child loss,” Parker said. “We’ve been working behind the scenes all these years and recognize the tremendous need for connection and understanding.”
Others involved include keynote speaker Rev. Darryl Owens, a women’s services chaplain and grief counselor in the department of spiritual health and education at UNC Hospitals, Rae Marie Marsh, a licensed Christian therapist, and the Rev. Clarence Laney Jr., pastor of Monument of Faith Church in Durham, who has a doctorate in ministry from the Louisville Theological Seminary and a master’s in divinity from Duke University. Parker is the host.
“My emotions have been all over the place,” Parker said of putting the conference together. “Yet, each day, God has sent little nuggets of encouragement to remind me to press forward. This summit is not just an event; it’s a heartfelt mission to reach more people, build community, and help others find their path through grief. I know that there is life after loss!! I’m a living testimony. It’s incredibly fulfilling to witness the resilience in others and to be part of their journeys toward healing. This work also continues to heal my heart.”
Arielle was one of four people in a sedan that was part of a caravan heading toward a nearby rope-climbing course, a team-building exercise that would wrap up the two-week leadership program at Wingate, about 30 miles east of Charlotte.
Police said the 18-year-old driver of the car, with Arielle in the backseat, drove through a stop sign, and a grain truck crushed the car at a crossroads not far from campus. Arielle, who had dreams of becoming a psychotherapist and even had outlined the path to get there, was killed. along with the driver.
Eventually, Parker got through a next breath, got through a first conversation without tears and even got through sending another child off to college.
Arielle’s laughter and singing, often filled their home.
“Give yourself permission to feel your emotions fully, with no apologies to anyone,” Parker has learned. “Grief is overwhelming, and it’s important to acknowledge your pain rather than suppress it. Allow yourself to cry, to be angry, or to feel lost. Embracing these emotions can be a crucial step in the healing process. Even with support, this is an individual journey.”
As a person of faith there was always a deeper spiritual component for Parker.
“Give God permission to start the healing process ” Parker said. ” Yes, He is the ultimate healer, but He does not force His healing. It is still our choice to let this tragedy break us or to move forward with His help to remake us. Trusting in His plan, even when it feels difficult, can help us find a path forward and create space for healing to begin. It is a long process, so please trust Him.”
Nancy.McLaughlin@greensboro.com
336-373-7049
@nmclaughlinNR
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Nancy McLaughlin
Faith and Values Reporter
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