By Anna McAree

Copyright belfastlive

A Derry man has opened up about his personal journey in beating cocaine addiction, which at it’s peak saw him craving the drug almost every 20 minutes. Ciaran Mac Cearáin, now runs a men’s group to help others seeking help with their mental health. The 37-year-old has told how, as a teenager, he enjoyed a social drink with friends but was never initially interested in drugs. He said: ” I started drinking when I was 15 or 16, just as a social aspect thing when you start to have a bit more free time. It started with a Friday night with the boys after the Derry City match , and we just had a couple of drinks and then would go home to our own beds. “I liked a drink, but I was never into drugs at all. I was into football, but I tore my ACL when I was 17, so then my weekends free up a bit. I didn’t have football on a Saturday or Sunday morning, so I didn’t mind going out on a Friday night because I didn’t have to get up in the mornings.” For Ciaran, the lack of purpose at the weekends then led him to be more open about drug use. He said: ” I started taking the legal highs, it gave me so much confidence and I felt 10 feet tall. But obviously, the come down from that is pretty severe, bear in mind I was only 18 or 19 at the time. “We then started with cocaine cut with creatine and other stuff, and once I started earning a bit of money, then I moved on to pure cocaine. Again, this was on a Friday, Saturday and Sunday night, but then I started using maybe one more day during the week. “I would make excuses to go out on a Tuesday or a Wednesday, to play pool or anything, but it was really about the drugs. Before I knew it, I was doing it every day of the week, and then every hour and then at its peak, it was every 20 minutes until my body started shutting down.” After making an appointment with his doctor, Ciaran knew his life had to change. He said: “Last year I started getting bladder pains and losing weight, so I went to the doctors and got sent for a urine test. He told me my urine was full of acid because the cocaine I was using was cut with boric acid. It is not for human consumption, and it was making my body shut down. It also makes people’s noses and the roof of their mouths erode as well. That was my wake-up call, and I knew I had to change my life or I was going to die.” Once Ciaran began his recovery journey, he saw the widespread need for support and became determined to help others. He said: “I did go to the Northlands centre and it is a great option to have, but there is not enough support. I think when I went to Northlands, I wasn’t ready, but going to their meetings gave me a mindset switch and gave me the tools to get myself off it. There was a woman called Mary there, and she let me talk about things I’d never spoken about before. “I am into active recovery, for me, it is key. You can’t just subtract the substance; you need to replace it. For me, it was going for walks every day and releasing the same chemicals in the brain.” “The men’s group came about my accident. I started putting videos up of my walks, and a lot of people were messaging me saying they were having the same problems as well. I thought I wanted to give something back, so I put a post up about going back to the gym and if anyone wanted to join, and it just blew up. “So many people have found help through it. There is one guy who was a street drinker and had at one stage been given his last rites, and has totally turned his life around. To help one person is enough for me.” Through his journey, Ciaran has seen the blocks that men face when trying to seek help for their own addiction or mental health issues. He said: “There is not enough help in Derry for men’s mental health. There is nowhere we can just walk in and talk. It is a matter of life and death for a man to have somewhere to talk and someone to put an arm around them. “With men, there is such an ego at play, and you’re told when you’re growing up to man up and not show emotion. For men, it is about breaking down that front that you’ve had up since you were a teenager. “Everybody deserves recovery. We should have somewhere where people can walk in and just speak to someone. We need a detox centre, too, of course, but it is not just about addiction; it is about loneliness and trauma as well. We should have somewhere where we can go and speak and not be judged. Ciaran also highlighted the positive side of social media in promoting a healthier, sober lifestyle. He said: “There is a massive shift in Derry at the minute to do with fitness and people seeing it through social media. People showing a healthier lifestyle on social media is then inspiring other people to do the same and it is like a snowball effect. “If you sign up to something like Hyrox, then you won’t want to go out and have a drink; you’ll want to keep yourself healthy and focus on training. Before you know it, then, you’ve created a new habit through fitness.” For all the latest news, visit the Belfast Live homepage here and sign up to our daily newsletter here.