“As much as the day could be a sad one, we choose to celebrate Dylan with lots of love, laughter and smiles.”
NORTH FORK, NY — Almost three years have passed since Dylan Newman, 18, died, leaving the North Fork cloaked in sadness — but with his legacy forever uniting the community in love.
Dylan, with his indomitable spirit, courage, and caring heart, touched countless lives — and he was loved profusely by a community that rallied to support him and his family during their most challenging hours, organizing fundraisers and sporting his favorite color, green, as a reminder of a young soul whose light and impact remain eternally strong.
His family has vowed to continue carrying on Dylan’s legacy through their not-for-profit organization, “Dylan Newman Forever 5.” On Friday, the organization will present the “3rd Annual Dylan Newman Forever 5 Golf Outing” fundraiser at the Island’s End Golf & Country Club, located at 5025 New York State Route 25 in Greenport.
The day includes club facilities, green fees and cart, beverages on the course, lunch, a buffet dinner, three-hour open bar, awards, a goody bag, raffles and a knockout pool. Registration costs $250 per golfer; sponsorships are also available.
Registration begins at 10:30 a.m., with lunch from 11 a.m. to 12:15 p.m. and a shotgun start at 12:30 p.m. To play, contact Jeff Standish at standi4@optonline.net or by calling 631-445-2832. To sponsor, contact Jen Becker at 1234sons@optonline.net or by calling 631-404-9779.
Reflecting on the golf outing, Dylan’s family spoke with Patch about the love and legacy their beloved Dylan has left behind — and why the event has such great meaning.
“One of Dylan’s favorite pastimes was playing golf at Island’s End. So, in honor of Dylan, we have the Annual DNF5 Golf Outing. On this day — which is, and will continue to be, on or around the day he passed — we celebrate the joy and happiness that encompassed the life of our Dylan,” his mother Tanya, father Todd, and sister Kelsey said.
“As much as the day could be a sad one, we choose to celebrate Dylan with lots of love, laughter and smiles.”
His family added: “During Dylan’s battle with his disease, the community wrapped their arms around him and our family. Even though Dylan is not physically here, the community continues to honor his legacy by attending various events for the DNF5 Foundation.”
His sister Kelsey added: “Dylan’s message to everyone would be, ‘Just smile and be happy, no matter what life throws at you. Just be kind and think of others. Always keep your head up,'” she said. “‘Never let anyone tell you that you can’t — just do! Whatever comes your way, tackle it with strength, courage, and with a simple smile.'”
The golf outing is especially symbolic, Dylan’s father Todd said, because it captures the essence of his son. “Dylan loved playing golf with his friends,” he said.
Dylan was a life force so strong, he united the entire North Fork in the truest form of love.
At his funeral in 2022, despite the sadness, there were touches of the joy that infused Dylan’s life — everywhere, there was green, a nod to his love for the color. Green sneakers. Green ties. Green ribbons and green clothing. And also, the green wristbands adorned with the words “Team Dylan” that graced so many, many fundraisers for a young man an entire town loved as their own.
Together, all of Southold Town mourned. Town Hall itself was illuminated in green, an unprecedented act to honor a boy who brought a community together in caring.
“Like so many others, we wanted to show the family how much Dylan meant to this community,” then-Southold Town Supervisor Scott Russell said.
At the front of the church was a screen, set up before the service began, with photos of Dylan from moments throughout his life, playing sports, enjoying barbecues, surrounded by family and friends — and smiling, always smiling.
The service, led by Rev. Dr. Peter Kelley, was somber but also filled with joyful memories and laughter as his friends and loved ones told stories about a young man known for his bright and ever-present positivity, his courage, his indomitable spirit, his love for others, and his passion for sports — including baseball and basketball.
Bagpipers played as Dylan’s family entered the church and hymns including “How Great Thou Art,” and “On Eagle’s Wings” soothed heavy hearts. The final hymn, “You Are Mine,” spoke to sorrow and hope: “I will come to you in the silence, I will lift you from all your fear. You will hear my voice. I claim you as my choice, be still and know that I am here. Do not be afraid. I am with you.”
Rev. Kelley described the many, many prayers. “Your prayers flew straight to the heart of God,” he said.
Close family friend Nancy Maaiki also spoke, describing Dylan as a “hero, a warrior, a superman,” with bright eyes and a smile that lit up every room.
A single boy, she said, brought thousands together — an entire community, from family and friends to complete strangers. “Dylan did the impossible,” she said. “He brought together people from all walks of life.”
The huge effort to help him, the sea of fundraisers, the parade and baseball games and the many green lights and cars with messages to Dylan, all of it, she said, “became something unimaginable. “Dylan gave his heart to all of you — and you gave it back,” she said.
As the many who loved him mourned, tributes to Dylan were a testament to the deep bonds he shared with family, friends, teachers, classmates, teammates, and even people he’d never met.
At a vigil held for Dylan, his father also spoke, remembering April 26, 2018, the day his family learned that Dylan had a tumor on his hip. Hundreds turned out for the first fundraiser, a “Dash for Dylan,” at Southold High School, soon after.
“I ended what I had to say that day with, ‘We have an army behind us,'” he said. “And this army is still strong.”
Newman thanked the community for the years of caring, and for surrounding his family with love.
Tears flowing, the crowd then walked the bases, a “final lap,” for Dylan. The Newmans gathered together on home plate, for their boy. They then went to stand by the fence, before Dylan’s photo and balloons with the number 5 — as the procession around the bases continued steadily, the green lights illuminating the night with love.
As he faced the crowd in church at the funeral, Newman added: “We will mourn him for a little while — but we will celebrate him for the rest of our lives.”
Speaking with Patch in recent months about her brother this week, Kelsey said: “They are so many ways to describe my brother from other people’s perspective but, from being his sister and being right by his side throughout his whole life, I would describe my brother as my hero. I have always looked up to Dylan my entire life and continue to do. Our bond was inseparable. Dylan could brighten up a room with his smile and laugh. All the memories with my brother — it was the little things I cherish. Going to practice together, talking and laughing in my room about everything. After long days taking trips to the hospital for treatment, I would go in his room to make sure he was good but he was the one worrying about me and asking how my day was. That was just the person my brother was, always looking out for others before himself.”
Kelsey said she’s found the strength to move forward, despite the tremendous loss, by following her brother’s example.
“We would both say to each other, ‘Take one day at a time’ and that’s just I did. Being his sister, watching him go through everything, he has given me strength in so many ways that I wish he knew. My brother is why I keep my head up every day, always have a brave face on when days are harder than others. He taught me to never to give up on anything that comes my way and that’s the way I tackle it — because he never gave up and always had a smile on his face, every day.”
Holidays are hard, but her family still finds ways to honor the boy they loved with all their hearts and souls. “Through my brother’s foundation, The Dylan Newman Forever 5 Foundation, my family and I give back to community, from giving gifts to our local church for kids, to Toys for Tots, to local businesses,” Kelsey said. “We do lots of things for the holidays for families that are private — but knowing we are putting a smile on someone face is what Dylan would want us to do and will continue to do that. “