By Daniella Gray

Copyright newsweek

Two parents from Texas set to adopt their second child have been praised online for their approach with their first.Maddy and Ramsey Hashem, 29 and 28, shared the steps they took to make their 2-year-old, Aurora, feel involved before and after the adoption of her baby brother Theo on TikTok.From attending every appointment to reading children’s books about adoption and families, the couple made sure Aurora knew she was an important part of the process—even if she couldn’t fully grasp it at the time.They played “families” together and made sure she had a diverse range of baby toys. They would also bring up Aurora’s future sibling while doing her favorite activities, saying, “One day, you’ll have a brother or sister to paint with!”Aurora, who is also adopted, was already familiar with conversations about birth families, but Maddy and Ramsey were careful to slowly introduce the idea of another child joining their family.”It honestly couldn’t have gone better for them meeting for the first time,” Maddy told Newsweek. “The first few weeks were a blur, but she was always asking about him, which made me feel reassured she was going to be a great big sister.”For Maddy, her favorite moments came a few months later. “She started to say things … like, ‘Theo is my brother, he’s adopted. I have a birth mom, Theo does too!'”It made me feel a sense of relief like … we haven’t been doing this all for nothing. She was listening to us the whole time,” Maddy said.Balancing the needs of a newborn with the needs of a toddler wasn’t easy, but Maddy said one-on-one time was key.She and Ramsey would give Aurora individual attention whenever Theo was napping. They were also intentional about taking her on solo dates like trips for ice cream or to the library.That approach extended to bigger moments as well. Just two months after Theo’s arrival, the family had a Disney Cruise booked.While Ramsey stayed home with the baby, Maddy and Aurora went with her mother. “I think it was really great for her to get a … break where she got a lot of attention and felt really special,” she added.Looking back, Maddy said the one thing she would do differently is prepare Aurora more for the logistics of adoption day. Because of hospital rules, Aurora couldn’t be there for Theo’s birth, which, Maddy said, confused her a little.”Ultimately, it worked out in the end, and she met him at home two days later after all of the paperwork was signed and we were cleared to leave the hospital,” Maddy said.Maddy’s post went viral on TikTok, amassing over 871,000 views. Hundreds flooded the comments section with praise and support for how the couple transitioned Aurora into her new role as big sister.”Thank you for showing how beautiful adoption can be,” one user wrote.”As someone who was born using a donor and only found out as an adult, thank you for gently explaining and normalizing adoption rather than hiding it from your children,” another added.A third commented, “The meeting slide made me bawl. The excitement and love you can see she already has is so pure.”Maddy has also received many questions about open adoption, since both of her children maintain connections with their birth families.”I think it really intrigued people,” she said. “I just hope that our video is helpful to other families who are going through this process and want to create strong bonds between their kids.”For parents considering adoption, Maddy’s advice is to involve your kids at every step, but manage their expectations.”Never overpromise that you’re going to bring a sibling home really soon because nobody knows how long the process will take,” she said.Maddy also advised to be honest, read books with your children and talk openly about adoption and what it means.”Talk to them about how they’re not being replaced and how excited you are for them to have a sibling,” she added. “That’s a totally normal feeling for a child to have, even if the child … is biological.”