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The question of whether looks matter in a relationship recently sparked debate online. It started when a woman shared her opinion that physical attraction is important and shouldn’t be ignored when choosing a partner. She said being attracted to the person you’re with is the bare minimum, and many people, especially in arranged marriages, often “settle” for practical reasons like money, foreign citizenship or property instead of attraction. Her post drew mixed reactions as many agreed that while looks aren’t everything, they do play a role in forming a connection. Some users pointed out that physical appearance often acts as the first filter, and attraction helps build closeness and confidence in a relationship. Others added that fitness and self-care also matter, saying that they can be friends with someone who is overweight but can’t think about marrying them. Women Ask Other Women Not to Settle Without Attraction Taking to Reddit, a woman wrote, “Girlies, looks DO and SHOULD matter. You should be attracted to your partner. That is the BARE MINIMUM. Please don’t ‘settle’ for someone you aren’t attracted to. ‘I don’t care about looks. Personality and inner beauty matter more,’ sounds cool for social media virtue signalling, but isn’t applicable in the real world. No matter how ‘woke’ we pretend to be online, we all have our preferences regarding height, physique, skin colour, etc. And there is nothing wrong with that.” “The first thing you’ll see every day after waking up is your partner’s face. You should be attracted to him. This post is primarily for arranged marriage market girlies who will literally marry a guy they don’t find attractive based on him being an NRI and having a green card/ citizenship/work visa of another country. Having a high salary. Having large ancestral property,” she added. Looks DO and SHOULD matter. byu/Serious-Tomato404 inTwoXIndia ‘Agreed, But It Shall Not Matter More Than Personality’ Reacting to the post, a user wrote, “Diet and exercise honestly says a lot about your personality (self-control, discipline, motivation) – these are traits that are super attractive as well, in addition to the physical attributes.” Another shared, “I am not attracted to obese men (personal preference). Even if an obese guy has 11/10 personality, I will not date him. Can we be friends? Yes. Will I treat him with respect just as I do any other person? Yes. Dating him? Nope.” “It’s not a ‘woke’ political statement to say looks do not matter. It’s a fact that physical attraction is temporary. A deeper bond and connection between two people is created when they interact more and find each other interesting,” a comment read. An individual stated, “Yes, looks do matter, but it shall not matter more than personality, empathy, maturity, emotional understanding and behavioural habits. Looks may or may not be permanent, but the rest would be there for the lifetime with no major changes unless some exceptions.” Another mentioned, “Physical features act as the first filter when it comes to dating or the arranged marriage market. You judge a stranger based on his/her looks and then decide whether or how to proceed forward.” One more added that they will prefer someone who may not be considered very good looking but makes them feel safe, respected and cared for. They explained that outer beauty fades, and in a time when people can easily change how they look through various treatments, emotional connection matters more. Still, they agreed that physical appearance does play a role. Things like height or skin colour can’t be changed, but taking care of their health, grooming, and style shows their effort.
